22 Comments to “ Question: Do you consider online and offline friends to be equally important? .” Please leave a comment below, thank you.

1. # 1
   Simonne :
   ( September 2nd, 2007 at 2:51 am )

   All kinds of friends have the same importance to me. The online-offline split is not very clear. I have offline friends who live now in other countries, so we communicate online. If I had the chance, I would gladly meet my online friends any time. A friend is a friend, regardless the available means of communication at a given time.



2. # 2
   Bes :
   ( September 2nd, 2007 at 12:17 pm )
   

   Thanks for sharing Simonne. I have updated the writing to include a very brief and simple definition of what I mean by online and offline friend, and thus creating a thin line between them for definition purposes.

   If I understand your comment correctly, all friends, whether online or offline, are of the same importance to you, correct? The movement of offline friends into the online world or vice versa is a very interesting concept and experience, and allows one to view friendships in different ways. I am guessing since your offline friends also remain friends through the online world when they move to other countries, you realize how friendship can remain intact even if moved completely to the online world.

   Thanks again.



3. # 3
   mlankton :
   ( September 3rd, 2007 at 5:12 am )

   I think it’s alarming that some people don’t make a distinction between the two. Further evidence that the internet creates isolation and distracts some people from the real world.



4. # 4
   Bes :
   ( September 3rd, 2007 at 2:57 pm )
   

   mlankton, thanks for the comment. So in your view, the distinction between online and offline friends is very important?

   I agree that many times the internet does create different views about things that may prompt people to actually view offline friendships lightly, the way many online friendships are viewed because of the nature of the internet allowing us to call every online person a friend, without actually having either of us [the people involved in online interactions or so-called friendship] practice any friendship qualities or having any friendship expectation from each other.

   Do you think online and offline friends can ever be equal, or treated equally? Which one do you prefer, if I may ask?



5. # 5
   Rob McNealy :
   ( September 3rd, 2007 at 3:59 pm )

   My friends are my friends. People online are only acquaintances.



6. # 6
   Lissy :
   ( September 3rd, 2007 at 5:20 pm )

   You never really know people you only know online. Body language is so important for so many things, especially trust. I have some pretty good online friends, but if one of them just stopped talking to me one day, I’d be a little sad, but not like heartbroken or anything.

   I’m all for meeting people online though. That’s how I met my boyfriend, though we first saw each other offline, so it’s not exactly the same. We just had never talked offline.

   But back to that trust thing. I was flirting with this one guy for a while a few years ago. And he seemed like perfect. …Then I got an e-mail from his wife asking me to stop talking to him because he was too old for me. Yeah.



7. # 7
   inspirationbit :
   ( September 4th, 2007 at 11:37 pm )

   I tend to agree more with Simonne - I have many friends, but only a few of them (both offline and online) are very close ones, who I can tell a secret or two, and I also have several offline friends who now live very far from me, thus became online friends. Friendship plays an essential role in my life. It’s not so easy to make friends, so if you do, cherish them and nurture your friendship, be it online or offline.



8. # 8
   Bes :
   ( September 5th, 2007 at 11:53 am )
   

   Rob McNealy, I really appreciate your comment, thank you. So if I understand your comment correctly, in your view, offline people can be friends and online people can only be acquaintances? If that is the case, is it because online you may not know a person completely, or some other reason?

   Lissy, thank you for the comment.

   So in your view, friendship requires a lot of things that the online world does not currently offer, like body language, correct? Also, you would be more concerned if an offline friend stopped talking to you, compared to an online person talking to you, right?

   That online flirting story does sound strange, sorry to hear thats. It is not untypical at all since online, it can be very easy to give a different perception of who we really are in the offline world. Did the guy ever explain himself to you, or no contact after that?

   Vivien-inspirationbit, thanks for sharing.

   So for you, both online and offline friends can be important, and right now they actually are, right? I completely agree about cherishing friendship: good friends are really, really hard to come by and good friendships are hard to make, so if the opportunity comes knocking, we better take actions, or at least that’s what I think.

   Thanks again.



9. # 9
   Lissy :
   ( September 6th, 2007 at 5:01 pm )

   yes, yes, and no contact. I think his wife would have been angry.



10. # 10
    Bes :
    ( September 7th, 2007 at 10:03 pm )
    

    Thanks for explaining Lissy. Sorry you had to go through that; you have a real story of your own! I wonder what happened to that guy. :p



11. # 11
    Mighty Blogger - Today’s Top Blog Posts on Blogging - Powered by SocialRank :
    ( October 1st, 2007 at 4:01 am )

    [...] Question: Do you consider online and offline friends to be equally important? [...]



12. # 12
    Gorilla Trades :
    ( October 5th, 2007 at 2:07 pm )

    Offline friends for sure, no doubt about it. If somebody says that it is online ‘friends’, then they have no offline friends. My offline friends i’ve known for years and have been through great and tough time together with them. I know i can count on them for anything. I can’t say that about anyone i’ve met online.



13. # 13
    Pyramus :
    ( October 11th, 2007 at 7:33 pm )

    Honestly, I don’t consider both of them equal. There is a big difference of actually seeing your friends and seeing their reaction when you actually tell them something rather than let emoticons speak for you. I mean, sure, online friends are great, basically because you know you are hiding in the animosity of it all. Just my two-cents’ worth.



14. # 14
    Bes :
    ( October 29th, 2007 at 11:57 am )
    

    I apologize for the late replies; I was thinking among other things, and am now catching up.

    Gorilla Trades, thanks again for the comment, and for sharing. It is indeed very hard to realize when someone online is reliable or not, since typing things is different than actually doing what is being said or implied, unless we count saying or implying things as real satisfactory actions also.

    So in your view, online friends do not exist? What if someone has online friends but no offline friends; can the online friends in such a case be as reliable or real as the hypothetical offline friends?

    Pyramus, thanks for the comment.

    So you are thinking a little bit along the same lines as Gorilla Trades [above] and vice versa.

    Do you think there is something else besides online privacy and the supposed-anonymous nature of things that attracts us to the idea of viewing online people as friends and considering them as being equal to offline friends?



15. # 15
    Gorilla Trades :
    ( October 30th, 2007 at 9:20 am )

    my first comment may have been a little rash. I think there can be online friends, i just don’t think there can be any substantial comparison between the two. Sure, there can be exceptions, but people can be anybody they want when their real identity is hidden behind a computer. At least in a face to face interaction the person would have to be pretty skillful at lying to come off as someone who they, in reality, weren’t.

    i feel like people you have met online, for me at least, would never make it past the ‘good acquaintance’ level on the “how well do i know you” scale –> stranger>acquaintance>good acquaintance>friend>best friend.



16. # 16
    Bes :
    ( October 31st, 2007 at 1:38 am )
    

    Thanks again for explaining more Gorilla Traces. Good point: the comparison element is very critical, as we need to realize whether or not we can even compare the two. Right now, it is so hard to even define an ideal or a normal offline friend, so it is can be even harder to compare a normal offline friend with a normal offline friend; our views of what is normal can be relative also.

    I kind of like that scale that you have: for me, the friend level is near the right edge, and thus around the same or within the same atmosphere as the best friend level. Online, many people remain in the 2nd level [acquaintance] yet they keep referring to each other as being in the 3rd or the 4th levels. I wonder if the internet is making it easier for many people to create an illusion of good friendship, while allowing people to not be friends at all.



17. # 17
    Gorilla Trades :
    ( October 31st, 2007 at 9:06 am )

    Online acquaintances may refer to themselves on the 3rd and 4th levels because it is too much of a pain to type “acquaintance”. Also, moving through the levels of the scale can take longer for some and shorter for others. i feel that people you meet online would take longer, because you only have one way to judge them and that is through the way they type.



18. # 18
    Bes :
    ( November 4th, 2007 at 12:59 pm )
    

    Thanks again Gorilla Trades [can I say GT in the future, if you don't mind? ]. Hmmm, that is an interesting point. How about the word “contact” instead? I agree about moving through the different levels of scales taking a lot of time in many cases and shorter amounts of time in other cases. Online, it does take longer to know people but since it also involves typing as being the main focus in many cases, many people simply jump ahead and start assuming that someone is a good friend or a good enemy.



19. # 19
    Gorilla Trades :
    ( November 5th, 2007 at 8:56 am )

    Bes, ‘GT’ is just fine, no problem. True, i think ‘contact’ is a great way to describe online ‘friends’ or ‘acquaintances’. it conveys a little more formal or professional nature to the relationship, as opposed to the informal ‘friend’ label.



20. # 20
    Bes :
    ( November 5th, 2007 at 10:01 pm )
    

    Thanks. I prefer the “contact” moniker also, as it is a bit more truthful than the word “friend.” At least that way we know we know someone but we know the limitations too.



21. # 21
    pritun :
    ( August 15th, 2008 at 12:49 am )

    yes they are equally important



22. # 22
    ingrediente :
    ( October 24th, 2008 at 6:16 am )

    I value offline friends the most. I know them live, I trust them more. Online friends are buddies, not friends in the true sense of the word.

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