Continue reading… »

2 : You tend to be rude to new people because of personal issues not related to them

The 2nd biggest sign that you are a moody person is that you act very rude and distant towards new people. Whether you meet someone in person, through a blog comment or via some instant messenger, you act rude and distant, trying your best not to communicate effectively with them. You may call yourself a professional or a careful person in such cases, because you act “distant.” I think such qualities make you more insecure and childish instead. Why? Consider the following example that I ran into before, which will show you why acting in such a way means you do not know how to communicate with new people because of feeling insecure for various reasons.

An example of a girl I knew who acted rude only around new people

I once knew a girl who would act nice around everyone she already knew. At the same time, however, she would act rude around new people. She would meet people for the first time even at her family gatherings and be rude to them. She would disagree with them, ignore them, or even insult them. At first I used to think that she probably had stress from her work or classes, and she was letting off her stress on innocent people. However, I soon realized that the new people themselves were somehow, indirectly of course, triggering something inside of her that made her act rude towards every new person who crossed her path.

One day I brought up the issue indirectly, talking about one of the “new” people she had argued with recently. She told me that because of her past relationships with both friends and boyfriends, she did not trust people easily. I realized that even though she had gone through bad experiences, her inability to control her sadness and anger due to past memories was making her act rude and moody in front of new people, and that was no one else’s fault but her own. That was also probably, and unfortunately, a psychological issue that she needed help with. It was hard for her to make friends, but it was easy for her to insult people. Think about it: would you want to be friends with such a person yourself?

Letting your inner fear and rudeness affect innocent strangers around you will result in all your relationships getting affected negatively

If you are a person who exhibits the above mentality or characteristic, you may be mistaken that just because you are hurt, or even because you may be hot or intelligent, you do not need to smile and act nice towards new people who have done you no harm whatsoever. It just shows that probably one of the two things happened during your childhood:

1. You did not learn, nor were you taught, to respect new people that you met
2. You ignored the lesson of respecting new people you met

Either way, you probably have a serious problem. Some people even go the opposite way and act rude simply because they think they can. Now, you may be a gangster who acts rude around new people and says “I don’t give a damn what people think!” Well, my gangster-wanna acquaintance, if you were a gangster, why would you be feeling uncomfortable or different meeting new people in the first place? You are not a gangster. You are a punk. Really!

Acting moody in front of new people all the time is a serious problem that you need to address

It does not matter whether you act moody in front of new girls because your past experience tells you that acting serious and macho will help you find dates, or if you want to act moody in front of new guys because your past experience tells you that they all want to have sex with you. The fact that you act moody when meeting new people, for any reason, whether sad or not, shows that you do not know how to act when you meet new people, and thus you let your inner moodiness, no matter why it exists, to take over your interactions with new people. That is a serious problem you need to address, or at least realize and keep in mind.

What do you think of today’s Moody Sign Number 2? Have you ever noticed such people? Have you experienced such a mood yourself? What is your opinion on how such moody people should be treated?

Please come back tomorrow, when I will try a little bit different writing method to have a little bit smaller article than today, to talk about the 3rd sign that you may be moody: acting moody only around people of the opposite sex [male/female] because of stereotypes!

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

1: You act rude openly when you do not need something from others.

The biggest sign that you are a moody person, horrible at communicating with others, is that you become friendly and nice during times when you need something from others. Otherwise, you act rude and distant, and such a rudeness and distance is obvious and visible to everyone. Now, you may think you are smart. Who wouldn’t think they are smart because they know how to act nicer in order to get things from people, right? Consider the following example of someone I knew before, which will show you why such a moodiness does not mean you are smart, but that you have psychological issues.

An example of a moody guy who acted nice only when he wanted something from me

This guy I knew from a community college class worked at a restaurant near the college as a waiter. He was the type of person who could not feel comfortable around people who were not from his own ethnic background. He acted like a gangster when he was surrounded by 20 people from his own ethnicity. Whenever he was alone, however, he only found the concept of moodiness to be his true friend.

Every time I ate there, the guy’s mood would swing from one extreme to the other, depending on whether or not he wanted something from me. If he did not need anything from me one day, he would not only avoid serving my table that day, but he would also avoid looking at me at all, as if he did not notice me. Whenever he needed some computer help, he would serve my table or bring some juice for free. He would ask me about my health and about my off-campus activities. He would then always ask me about the computer issue he was having. I would always think to myself at that very moment, “Aaah! The reason he is so happy and nice today is because he needs something, I see.” After he would get what he wanted, he would act happy around me for the rest of the day.

However, if I ever told him I did not know what the solution to his computer problem was, he would end the conversation within five minutes: guaranteed. He would always say “Oh wait, I have to serve a customer.” and then run away. He would then never come back, nor even look at my table, for the rest of that day.

I would always think to myself: “If he just knew how to use people perfectly, it would at least make him look smart. The way he acts right now, he just looks psychologically disturbed or even stupid as he does not know how to control his moodiness.”

Such an open and uncontrollable moodiness can be a handicap!

Imagine someone with such a handicap! They are moody because of not feeling comfortable over something, yet they are willing to hide that moodiness only when they need something from someone. Forget discrimination or racism; such people have something disturbed in their biological system, deep down inside their brain. They do not know how to act normal in front of people, yet they try to use other people, which is weird. If you do not know how to act normal in front of people, you cannot get away with the selfish act of trying to use people by acting nice to them. You will only look stupid, unfortunately. Or should I say fortunately?

1st type of moody person cannot hide moodiness when trying to be evil, and thus has a psychological issue

Here is a revelation for you: if you are the type of person I described above, you are not smart because anyone like me can figure that such people act nice only when they need something. If you were good at using other people, you would make sure no one realizes that fact. Not only that, the mere fact that you are not good at using people and yet you still want to use people shows that you want to use people whenever you feel like it, but your moodiness is hindering your efforts. Unfortunately, that is like a double whammy right in your own face!

What does this “double whammy” mean? Well, it means you have a psychological issue where your inability to communicate effectively with people combines with your mood swings to result in people figuring out that you act nice to them only when you need something. Tsk tsk.

What do you think of today’s Moody Sign Number 1? Have you ever noticed such people?

Please stay tuned for tomorrow, when I will tell you about the 2nd sign that may classify you you as a moody person: acting serious only around new people because of unrelated issues in your life!

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

My friend was asking me if I thought the co-worker was an evil woman, as she first “flirted” with him, “indirectly seducing” him as a tease, and then simply moved on when he showed interest. I said “I do not think, it makes her any of those things, though I may be wrong.” I was looking at my food when my friend asked me “Why does she not respect the fact that I was being professional back then?” I looked at my friend. That was the time I either told him the truth because he was comfortable asking me for advice, or that was the time I acted like a typical contact who agreed with everything he said and showed sympathy on everything. I said “In my view, you were not being professional back then. I think you were being a moody bitch instead to someone innocent who was not responsible or even award of things happening with your family. Would you respect someone like that yourself if you were in her position?”

Many people hide their inability to communicate well behind the concept of professionalism

That is the truth of life, and the biggest myth of professionalism. People act serious, moody, weird, strange, rude, and they label it all as being professional or something else so that they can pretend to get away with their actions and moods. Professionalism has nothing to do with communicating your emotions with others. Professionalism also has nothing to do with the office culture. Professionalism means that you are willing to express what you want in order to help yourself and someone else without letting either your or someone else’s personal life, completely unrelated to the task at hand, affect the involved parties. I talk to at least 10 or so people daily, and many of them act moody almost everyday in one way or another.

The funny thing is, most of these people say they are being professional when they act moody. They may become quiet or distant all of a sudden, and they think it is a sign of professionalism, to not talk too much. They may avoid talking to bloggers who do not share the same religion and they think that is professionalism. They may only comment on blogs by certain people who agree with them, and not respond to others at all and still consider it professionalism. The biggest joke is this: these people sometimes act serious or very rude in their comments to other bloggers, and they think it is professionalism at play. No, that is not professionalism; that is your bad childhood at play, the same childhood in which you did not learn how to be respectful even to strangers.

10 points in 10 posts in 10 days - 10 signs that you may be moody

Starting from tomorrow, I will write a post a day, outlining 10 posts in total that talk about signs that may classify you and me as being moody. Each day I will give you a real life example of someone acting moody, and I will also tell you what I think about it. I may not express real names or blog urls, but many of you may know who I am referring to. Here is an interesting fact: there is nothing wrong with being moody. Almost everyone is moody everyday. But when your moodiness starts affecting other people through your interactions and dealings with them, you are allowing your inner emotions affect other people, which is unfair to those people.

So please stay tuned. From tomorrow, I will talk about some very weird things that you may find very typical and common, but if you pay close attention, you will see moodiness sprinkling all over some people, resulting in nearby people also getting some of the moodiness sprinkled on them.

Wait! What happened to my moody “bitch” friend?

As for my friend, he was shocked to hear my answer. He asked me what he should do. I told him to simply apologize to her in person and explain everything, and then to move on. He thanked me, and did exactly that, though very reluctantly. This morning he called me and said that his co-worker had e-mailed him back recently, telling him that she was interested in going to the LA Brea Tar Pits this week as she had time. I doubt they will date or anything, but it is better to be friends than to be enemies. So today, I think they both went to the TAR pits. Sweet, isn’t it? I mean the situation, not the tar, and definitely not the ugly moodiness! =P

« Show less..