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If you are a blogger, you may have a habit of responding only to certain comments or commentors, or you may try to respond to every comment. You may also not respond to any comment at all. If you are a blogger, you should realize that there is a difference between responding to comments and simply acknowledging comments. Thus, simply acknowledging comments as an obligation on a regular basis does not mean you know how to, and that you actually are willing to, communicate and interact with your readers.

Responding to comments as a reader

If you are a reader and a commentor on a blog, you may or may not like responding to each and every comment addressed to you, or you may or may not like responding to comments that revolve around your comment. You may even have the habit of tackling and addressing each comment on other people’s blog, based on certain criteria such as the type of a blog in question, the type of topic covered, etc.

One thing we should keep in mind is that every blogger can also be a commentor, and every commentor can also be a blogger through the comments, so both bloggers and commentors can also fall into both categories at the same time.

I try my best to respond to each and every comment

I try to respond to everyone on this site, and I try my best to keep up to date with my comments and any due comments on other sites. Sometimes it takes a while, even a few weeks or months, though I try my best to get to everything. For me, late follow-ups are better than no follow-ups. Communicating with others is one of my main priorities.

I just went through all of my comments and e-mails, and unless I have misplaced e-mails or cannot easily find things because of numerous computer backups, I am happy to say that I have responded, via comments, instant messages, e-mails and other channels of communication, to each and every comment and commentor on all of my blogs for the last 7-8 years or so, with the exception of RA Project, Flickrness and Eyeography so far; I should hopefully be able to get to them soon. Responding to comments in my view means communicating with the commentor, and I do that even on the phone [voice or text messages].

Is responding to all comments one of your priorities?

Keeping the above in mind, do you like responding to all blog comments?

Please let me know what your opinion is about this topic, and also whether or not you think responding to all comments is necessary. Thank you.

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1. Not talking about a job means you have no job

   Many people assume that if someone does not talk much about their offline job, they do not have a job, or they do not have a good job. These people probably cannot understand the fact, easily, that sometimes people simply do not want to talk about something in their personal life as it may be boring, or it may be personal and they may not want to share it with people who are not genuinely interested in knowing.

   I personally get to hear this every other day, since I do not talk about my offline work activities, or anything similar, on my site here or with others that much. Instead of asking, people assume things about my job. I get over 50 calls every day alone related to “work” that I do not get paid for, and I have to meet around 10 people every 2 days or so, directly, in private meetings, to do things related to work, round the clock; sometimes I have to meet people at 3 AM. That is why I am always finding it funny when some people do not ask me about my activities, but simply assume that I do not do anything other than to blog on this site and eat chocolate.

2. Never talking about your offline life means you have no offline life

   Some people assume that if you do not push your offline personal life into the online world, you do not have an offline life. That is why if you remain quiet in a conversation or try to talk about something, people will immediately assume things about you.

   I personally, rarely talk about offline life online, though if someone asks for it, I may answer in detail depending on the person and the situation. However, people will assume things like my relationships, hobbies, views, religion, sexual preference, etc. on an almost constant basis, because I do not talk about my personal life out of the blue in every chat window that can be opened.

3. The more aggressive you are, the more right you are

   This one is a classic. Many people will assume that if they are aggressive about something, they will appear to be right in almost any argument. It is as if the art of being pushy and aggressive and on the offensive becomes more important than the point being argued.

   I see arguments online regularly, where someone will be very aggressive in questioning something, and they will assume that just because they are aggressive means that they will be able to make the other person look bad. Usually, if one is paying attention, it seems that acting aggressive has nothing to do with being rational or logical. Some times people get aggressive even while asking a question, which makes me wonder: “if this person is so tense while simply asking a question through text and over a topic this person does not care about, how easy will it be to control and affect this person’s moods in real life?“

4. The act of acting weird will go unnoticed

   Some people think that since one can hide in the online world, one can do weird things and go unnoticed. This includes copying others, acting weird like blocking others on instant messengers simply because one feels jealous, one talks to someone else only to ask for advice, etc.

   I think it is very easy to both hide and get noticed in the online world. Noticing someone copying ideas can be tricky, but it does not go unnoticed. I notice people copying my writing and other styles all the time, and I also see people taking ideas from the comments they receive and posting them as their own on a regular basis too. These people basically assume that other people will not care in the online world. On the contrary, people do care a lot in the online world if they feel they are being cheated.

5. Inquiring about something means your knowledge is limited

   Many people think that if you ask questions, you do not know anything about some topic. When a person tells me about a feed reader or some new technology, I listen attentively and I ask questions. That act of asking questions makes many people assume that I do not know anything about the thing I am asking about. I personally have a character where I will ask questions even about things I know, since I want to know more and I want to hear about things from other people’s perspectives a lot.

   Sure, when you ask a question, you may not know something about the element that is being asked in the question, but you may know generally about that something. For example, I have rarely been talking about making money online as of today, but I have made a lot of money online through online businesses in the past. That is why it is funny when people approach me and start assuming that I do not know how to make money online, instead of asking me about it. I am guessing this is one of those things you need to brag about so more people can know, including potential employers.

So there you have it. That is a list of 5 random things that many people assume about others online. Can you think of some other things that people assume? Can you relate to something here, or do you have any opinion about any of these points or about assumptions in general?

Thank you for reading.

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I wonder if people actually feel that they have caught someone in the “act” if they notice someone trying to impress them. It is as if one was committing a crime by impressing someone. Some times, I see people trying to impress simply to create an impression of appreciation, which is better than lying about appreciating while not doing anything to appreciate. However, some people get upset and say “Oh he/she is just trying to impress me“, even if the person trying to impress has no personal interest other than to show appreciation of some sort.

For example, someone telling you about the origin of coffee may not be because of that person wanting to show-off their knowledge, but to impress you by showing that they want to interact with you through a topic related to the activity you are involved in.

Online, the act of impressing someone can be misunderstood

Online, it can be easy to misunderstand the art and the act of impressing others, and instead one can perceive such things as being part of showing off. Even if such was the case, the aim of such an impression, or such an act of impressing others, solely exists in many people only to make the other person feel appreciated in some manner.

What is your opinion about the possibility that sometimes only trying to impress someone may actually be a good thing? Thanks for reading.

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1. You own an iPod, or something similar.

   Think of the iPod as a luxury. Majority of the world cannot afford to buy food once a day, yet you have an iPod. You could have gotten the iPod as a gift from someone, or you could have bought it yourself. Now, how does this make sure that you are not poor? If you ask someone to lend you $100, while your iPod can be sold for $70, it means you want someone else to be inconvenienced by them giving you their money, while you do not want to give up listening to your iPod. Similarly, if you have something along the same lines, like a new laptop, and cannot part with it, you may not be poor. You can easily sell a laptop and get some money for it.

   Exceptions: Your job may depend on the laptop, or in some very rare cases, the iPod. Someone close to you may have given you the iPod and thus you cannot sell it, or else they will be greatly offended. Your iPod may probably be so old that you can only get $5 from it while you do not have money to pay the rent, which costs a couple of thousand dollars, etc. Of course, I can also say that if you can get $5 from your iPod, it means you are doing your best to make sure you utilize every resource possible before feeling that you are helpless and poor.

2. You can afford to buy a home or pay rent

   Home is another important factor that people and society have worked together to create. If you can afford to buy a home or pay rent for your current place of living, you are most probably not poor. Some ways to save money could be to cut off on living expenses: using less electricity, finding a cheaper place, selling off the home, renting a room to someone, etc.

   Exceptions: Even if you find a cheaper place, you may still not have the money you need. You may also already have the cheapest place anyone could get, unless you had a gun to force the landlord into lowering your rent. However, a gun usually costs money, so a really poor person may not be able to afford that. Unless, however, you use a knife to get a gun, but a knife costs too. Unless you use…..ok, never mind.

3. You can buy large combo meals from fast food places every day

   Food prices are a good way to measure the performance of an economy, and food is also a good way to measure the strength of your bank account, if you have one. If you can buy at least 2 large combo meals at McDonald’s or Carls. Jr.s every day, you are probably not poor. Why? You can buy cheaper stuff at grocery stores and cook things yourself for weeks, saving more than half the money you spend in a month on fast food.

   Exceptions: You don’t know how to cook, you do not have a kitchen, you get gift cards or coupons for the fast food purchase, etc.

4. You can buy the things you want

   The things you need are usually different than the things you want. Wanting to eat food daily is something you need. Wanting to buy coffee and chocolate everyday, in addition to other kinds of food, can be something you want. If you can afford to buy things that can be avoided on a regular basis, chances are you are not poor. Paying for a blog, host, design and extra features for your site just for a hobby also means that you are probably not poor since you can afford such a thing.

   I knew this guy once who would drink coffee 3 times a day, finish a pack of premium cigarettes every day, buy food supplies and also eat at fast food places multiple times a day. On top of that, he would ask from time to time to lend him something so he could pay his rent. I calculated his expenses with him and in front of him, and figured that he was spending around $250 for the things I just listed above. How much did he want me to lend him? Around $100 or so. I told him about this, and he stopped being friendly after that.

   Exceptions: You are addicted to smoking. By addicted, I do not mean that if you do not smoke you feel weird. No, feeling weird for not smoking is an excuse for people who want a lame excuse to keep spending money. By addicted, I mean if you stop smoking or drinking you feel extreme depression, or you get seizures and have to go to the hospital, etc. Also, without things like coffee, you may actually get literal headaches throughout the day resulting in you getting admitted to the hospital. Also, things like blog may maintain your sanity by allowing you to express yourself, and without that, you would be poor and insane, though some can say that such a reason is simply an excuse to spend on your blog while you do not have enough money for offline things.

   Another important exception to this rule is if you are Bes: Bes needs and wants chocolate every single day; no exception to this rule. Period. Bes used to give packs of chocolate to homeless people before someone threw it back at Bes and yelled “I want some change! What the HELL am I gonna do with that?” Bes apologized and moved on, and ever since, Bes has been thinking of never giving away any chocolate, but keeping it in the fridge to devour while writing posts at night.

5. You can buy things for others

   If you can buy things for others, you are most probably the opposite of poor. You may be rich. There is nothing wrong with buying a $500 watch for your boy/girlfriend, but there is something wrong with buying a $500 watch to impress someone and asking someone else to lend you $200 for your car payment at the same time.

   Exceptions: You feel your job or some relationship depends on you buying something for others so much, that you do not even have enough money for some personal things, like your own rent, enough food, etc. Sure, such an exception means you do not know how to have a good relationship and are in touch with the wrong people, but it also means that you may be poor and cannot help it. Another exception may be that you are raising a child or someone, and you want that child or anyone depending on your financially to be really happy, and thus you are sacrificing your own financial happiness.

I hope this list helps you realize whether or not you are really poor. Also, if you want to borrow money from someone, you may think twice before asking someone to part with their money, while you do not part with yours.

Can you think of more things to add to this list?

A good next topic could be “5 situations in which you wish you were poor.” Thanks for reading.

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Treating online people the same as offline people : you consider offline people to be true friends, you can talk to either offline or online and be satisfied, you give offline and online people the same priorities, etc.

Treating online people better than offline people : you trust and share your life with online people more than offline people, you prefer spending time with online people more than offline people, etc.

Treating online people worse/less than offline people : you trust offline people more than online people, you may also think online people can be inferior compared to the online people because of the online nature of things, you prefer talking in person instead of talking online, you avoid sharing personal stories with others online, etc.

Do you treat online people the same as offline people?

What is your opinion on this? Do you treat online people the same as offline people? How do you treat and compare the two?

Thank you.

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1. Someone asks you to comment on their blog because they comment on your blog
2. Someone asks you to help them with their blog because they helped you with yours
3. Someone asks you to guest blog for them because they guest blogged for you
4. Someone asks you to look at their content, like proofreading or video editing, because you asked them in the past to help you too
5. Someone asks you to promote their blog because they helped you promote yours

So, do you think you are in blog debt? Do you owe someone online something because of asking them favors or for their help?

Please let me know. Thank you for reading.

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Following are 5 random reasons you may be hiding from other people online on instant messengers and other forms of live, instant communication.

1. You are busy

   You may be working on some projects online, or you may be researching something online. You may even have accidentally opened your instant messenger program to check e-mails or something. However, someone has caught you, and now they are continuously talking about different things. In the future, you just remain offline or invisible because you are busy and do not want to be disturbed. You may even be just wanting to go to sleep at night, and thus you turn off your instant messenger or your computer.

2. You think you have done something wrong

   You may have stolen someone’s design or ideas. You may have even said or done something in public, whether good or bad, and may want to avoid people who may ask you embarrassing questions. For example, I know people who have tried to hide from online people because one of them told his friends that he was gay, and the other one told her friends about dating a close friend’s ex. Whatever the reason, you may feel as if your action of any sort may be being taken in a negative manner, even if what you did was a good thing in your view.

3. You want to avoid the other person

   You may have some grudge or some feeling against another person. You may even have strong, good feelings for the other person. You may simply not want to talk to a person because you want to talk to them for long, and you may not have enough free time right now. Such feelings and thoughts may result in you wanting to avoid that specific person only. One of the ways to do that would be to stay offline, to block someone, or to even come online during times when the other person is usually not online.

4. You do not know how to, or do not want to, interact with others online

   One of the things many people may not realize is that they may not be good at communicating and interacting with others, either offline or online, or even both. People may be shy, or they may not feel like talking to people most of the time. Whatever the reason may be, many people come online only to talk about specific, absolutely necessary things like personal or business related issues, and then they go offline right away.

   You may also simply not like communicating with others. That is why going online and telling others about your daily personal events or even work-related jokes may not sound appealing to you.

5. You have a great offline life

   This can probably be the simplest or the most complex reason for many people. For you, your offline life overshadows the online one completely, and there is probably nothing online that you cannot find in your offline life. You prefer being offline, as it makes you more happy. You do not feel the need to go online that much, or at all. Cell phones, meeting people in person, mailing postal letters, doing offline activities, and even e-mailing people sounds better to you than chatting instantly with people online.

That is a list of various reasons you and others may want to hide from other online people. These are not the only reasons people hide from others online, though these reasons will give you a good idea how our own personal and offline mentality about things is resulting in us applying many offline principles to the online world.

Can you think of more reasons why you or someone else may be hiding from others in the online world of chats and instant messengers? Do you agree with the above points, or disagree with any point? Have you ever thought about such a topic and such reasons? What is your opinion on this?

Thank you for reading.

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Some Reasons To Want Guest Bloggers On Your Blog:

• Having more types of content and writing on your site
• Attracting more audience because of different writing and topic styles
• Building relations with the guest bloggers and any audience they may have through any of their blogs
• Wanting to take time off from your blog so someone can fill your writing spot
• Wanting to share responsibilities on your blog

Some Reasons To Not Want Guest Bloggers On Your Blog:

• Wanting to have a single and consistent type of writing and topic style on your site
• Wanting to build relations with others through your own writing and not other people’s writing
• Guest blogging goes against your blogging philosophies and maybe some offline philosophy
• Wanting to maintain full control of your blog so that you can improve it instantly based on what you think is good
• Wanting to revolve the blog around your schedule which may include vacations and many days of not posting anything

So, what do you think about this? Do you want guest bloggers on your blog? If you do not have a blog, would you allow guest bloggers if you get a blog in the future?

Please let me know. Thanks for reading.

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Wanting to Guest Blog:

You like writing for others, you want more exposure for your site or your writing, you may want to advertise your website more, you like the idea of writing about different topics set by other people, you may want to build relationships with other bloggers, etc.

Not Wanting to Guest Blog:

You like writing on your own blog or in own comments, you do not want exposure or advertisement for your site or writing through guest blogging, you do not want to spread your writing to sites other than your own, you want to write only on topics you decide on your own, you like the idea of building relationships directly through your own blog, etc.

What do you think of Guest Blogging yourself?

What is your opinion on this? Do you want to guest blog on other blogs? Do you like the idea of guest blogging? What are your reasons for wanting or not wanting to guest blog on other sites?

Please let me know, I would really appreciate it. Thank you for reading.

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1. How is school/work going?

   Many people will either have good or bad experiences at places they study or work at, and even if they have a boring experience, it is something that can spur up a conversation. I like asking this question as it is nice to know what people think of two things that they may be doing more than most of other things in their life: study or work.

2. How is the weather?

   Almost everyone you ask such a question randomly, will have at least something to say about it. I like such a question as I sometimes like comparing the weather I may be experiencing, good or bad, with what other areas in the world are experiencing. For example, I love the rain, so if it has not rained for a while in my area, I may ask you if it has rained in your area. Why? Probably because I miss the rain.

3. Have you seen any movies lately?

   You can probably talk for hours if you ask some people any question about their favorite movie. Many people see movies regularly, as it is an activity that can be a hobby for many. This can be a very good question to not only carry on a conversation, but to start discussing a lot of things related to what is shown in almost any specific movie. I love asking this question because I love watching movies, and I want to find out about movies I have not seen, and I want to find out what people think of different movies, and watching movies in general.

4. So, what are you doing up so late at night?

   “Talking to you, of course!” This question can be asked when a conversation has literally stopped. The “So” word basically allows you to change the direction of any topic, if it has not stopped already, to something new. Finding out why one is up so late is not the destination for such a question; the reason why one is up is what you are after, as that will allow you to come up with some new topics. I like asking this question as it tells me more about the late night habits of other people, unless the other person is in some country where it is daytime, while it is night time in my area.

5. What did you eat for breakfast/lunch/dinner?

   This is a question you will rarely hear someone asking you, but this is a good thing to ask, since the topic of food can be a very typical one, and special too, for many people. Almost everyone will have an answer to this question, and it should give you some time or direction to steer a conversation towards something, including the concept of eating food or favorite restaurants. I love asking this question because I like eating food. I also ask this question when I am very hungry.

Thank you for reading. What is your opinion about these questions? Can you think up of some other questions that can do a similar trick? These questions may not only allow you to carry on a conversation, but they may actually become interesting to you after you have learned to use them for a while.

So, what did you have for lunch today?

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Being inconsiderate offline

Almost every week I talk to some friends who tell me about how they ran into some people who had no manners because they did not respect the culture, religion, political view or something else that my friend believed in. However, people usually do not talk about their own character not having any rules or views on how one should be accommodating of other views. For example, if a certain culture dictates how someone should eat, it can be very hard to find any rule or cultural characteristic that dictates how one can let someone eat anyway they want, if they did not subscribe to certain cultural trends.

If a culture, religion, or any other guideline view about something in life about is not accommodating of people who want to do things their own way while not hurting others, why can we ourselves not be more considerate to and of others and still follow our culture and our rules? If our culture or religion does not consider other conflicting views, does that mean our culture and religion is not good? Why can people not be all right with others doing the same thing in different ways? Does everyone have to have the same religion? Does everyone have to have the same culture? Does everyone need to have the same political view? Does everyone need to do everything in the same exact manner? As long as someone is doing something and not hurting others directly and intentionally, why can we not be happy with them, coexist with them, and even incorporate them and their views into our own lives?

Being inconsiderate online

I run into many blogs daily where people get upset over someone having differing view about something then them. A blogger may get upset and feel offended if someone else talks about contradictory views on religion, politics, or even blogging. However, should we not have the quality of being considerate to other views? Why can our own online views, such as blogging rules, dictate something like “We will treat and deal with the people who have the exact same views as us, in exactly the same manner as the people who have different views“?

Why is it that I cannot write something, like saying that blogging is just a stupid fad, without getting people to attack me without any reason? Being inconsiderate does not mean that you do not disagree with others. Being inconsiderate means that you cannot live normally while knowing that people have different views. The only reason we may be upset at others online, and thus be inconsiderate to them, is because those other people are going after ideas that we ourselves have either not thought of, or we have decided not to utilize them. We do not disrespect and disagree with others people because we believe we are right; we disrespect and disagree with others because they have a different view and because they do not subscribe to our views.

This mentality creates a little dilemma, if one believes in the concept of applying a theory to different things; does everyone then, when following the concept of being considerate to others, need to follow the same standards online? Why can we not have more blogs without any RSS feeds? Why can we not have nonstandard, and strange, labeling around a site, like the word “Backroad” instead of “Archives“? Why can we not have more blogs without the comment feature? One of the grand questions of all: if we want to be considerate to others, why can we not be comfortable with blogs that deliberately aim to be inconsiderate?

Do you think the concept of being considerate to others has any value for you?

What is your view on this? Do we have to criticize or hate every instance of something that we disagree with? Could that be the reason why many married and dating couples look like brothers and sisters, because many people want to find someone who not only acts like them but also looks like them? Can human beings, as a whole, ever have a mentality where they not only respect different views and people, but they also make it a part of their own character to revolve their own views and character on such a thing? We we, as individuals, easily have a mentality where we are not only considerate to others, but where we also revolve our own ideas and beliefs around the idea of letting other ideas and beliefs prosper within our own life domain?

I am touching the introduction of this touchy subject very lightly, as this subject probably defines the lives of many people out there, and deserves more than just a single post that was written while Bes was hungry. Do you agree or disagree with this?

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You may forget bloggers who helped you in different ways

I have realized that many times, when bloggers get what they want, like an increasing number of comments or blog popularity, they forget or deliberately ignore the bloggers who helped them reach that stage. If you are such a blogger, once you become famous or achieve some blogging goals, you may start ignoring the small time bloggers who may have given you advice before, while focusing no more prominent bloggers.

You may also simply start linking less to the bloggers who helped you in the past, even if they write great quality content. You may also tend to e-mail or IM them less, while interacting with new, famous bloggers more. One of the reasons you may forget some people who helped you in the past is that those bloggers may not have helped you before in ways you wanted to be helped, but now that you have achieve some blog popularity, they may be offering a lot of help to you.

Have you forgotten the bloggers who helped you? Have you been forgotten by other bloggers?

What is your opinion on this? Do you still keep in touch with the bloggers who helped you improve, directly or indirectly? Do you know of bloggers who asked for your help before, but now that they consider themselves to be more popular, they stopped contacting you?

Thank you for reading.

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