You walk around in circles¹,
I am the center.
You always hear what I say,
even when I whisper.
You look at me like that other girl²,
like a damn predator.
Wherever I might want to go,
you are already there.

If I stop at a gas station,
you are always right behind me.
If I don’t have enough money,
you choke the gas attendant to make sure the gas’s free.
If I lock myself out of my house,
you somehow have the extra key.
I usually wake up from a nightmare,
dreaming you are right beside me.

People sometimes tell me,
“You two look good as a couple.”
I look around and see no one,
and ask “DAMN WHAT COUPLE?”
“Relax, the two of you, silly”³,
they say while pointing behind me.
I quickly turn and from the corner of my eye,
see a shadow disappear behind me⁴.

People sometimes ask me,
“You’re alone. Where is your boyfriend?”
I say “What are you talking about?”
They say “we’re talking about your boyfriend!”
I guess homophobic people are aplenty⁵,
so having any guy close by means he is your boyfriend.
At least I know that one more person since last month has started following me⁶,
that this time it is a guy, and probably a supposed-friend.
I guess having an invisible stalker in the eyes of many,
can result in having a boyfriend.

I am worried, something freaky is going on,
why am I the only one being followed?
Now I know what a girl feels like,
when by desperate guys she is followed⁷.
It’s all right, life is full of weird things,
like having 2 people get obsessed with me at the same time⁸,
one being a homophobic girl and the other being a yet-to-be-gay guy who likes that girl⁹.
I guess recognition won’t come this way,
but one following the other, stalkers keep falling like the rain.
Though I wonder, why would anyone want to follow a soul who always gets a “Inzane! Zain, you are inzain!“,
a soul that brings change and happiness to others but inside may have a lot of pain.

Could it be because you like that other girl,
the very girl that is also obsessing about me?¹⁰
Could it be that in your search for vengeance for your pointless life,
you started following the very person who can see your pointless life: me?
O’ moronic Stalker, I don’t carry signs that say “Available for stalking“,
go stalk the girl stalker who is obsessed with me.
You two will be happy together, stalking and preying on each other,
in the wonderful game that stalkers call “The Stalking Spree.”

Long live you, O’ Stalker,
At least you don’t stalk me like that girl,
the girl who is a self-proclaimed girlfriend of mine.
Die soon you, O’ Stalkers,
since you’re both creepy,
and because I want you to stay away from my life of a drowning cloud.
I have enough and better wonders in my own life,
things that hopefully one day will be spoken out loud.
Maybe one day you both will realize and tell others, out of the entire world,
what Bes is and was really all about.

1. A guy I met last month who is following me in different ways and spreading rumors about me. He also drops into any conversation I have with any female; not sure why. He also follows a few other girls to their homes, including the other stalker girl mentioned here. [↩]
2. The new girl who thinks we are dating, and the one who keeps calling me several times a day. That story deserves a post of its own. She also, in her desperate times, calls the stalker guy to ask him why I am not calling her, which results in him getting excited and pursuing me to spread rumors about me, in order to make me look bad so she go drool after him instead. I hope he wins, as I don’t want her! [↩]
3. A professor said this last week, after I said DAMN WHAT COUPLE? to him. [↩]
4. I did get a glimpse of his orange t-shirt, before he got into the elevators. I had an appointment so I did not follow him at that time. I called him later and asked him if he was at the university around that time and if he saw me. He giggled and said he was around the university, and he was not sure if he saw me or not. [↩]
5. You would imagine San Francisco area as having less homophobic people. You’re completely wrong. Let me be, maybe, the first one on the planet to say this: San Francisco and the entire Bay Area has more homophobic people, in terms of anti-gay-lesbian-bisexualism feelings and not numbers, than most other states. Only here you can’t be physically violent about it easily without being noticed easily. [↩]
6. The other one being the new obsessed girl [↩]
7. every experience makes me feel like a certain way. Imagine being in the restroom at a university when your phone rings, and you hear a voice from the other end of the restroom saying “Are you going to answer that?“, the voice being the voice of that guy stalker. He wasn’t even supposed to be at that movie theater that day, which was about 45 miles from where our usual meeting/encounter point, the university, is. [↩]
8. I should maybe make a public log of everyone following me. If anyone is interested let me know. [↩]
9. I am sure he is at least bisexual because of many things, but he always says he hates gays because he is an “African-American Christian influenced by Muslim culture, and both of those religions are against the existence of gay people.” Maybe I should start saying I am gay to get him and her off my back, though I wonder if that will result in him stabbing me instead because of that. [↩]
10. Lucky me, eh? Not only am I avoiding a girl who thinks we are dating, I now have to look out for a guy who likes her and is obsessed with me because she is obsessed with me. They complete each other in their quest to stalk me: she stalks me around the house and he follows me whenever I leave the house. [↩]