Continue reading… »

Bes checked around, and noticed no cars nearby. Bes started driving on lane dividers, making sure the white lane divider lines were under the car. Bes wanted to crush the nut. No, let me rephrase that. Bes wanted to annihilate the nut for reasons even Bes did not understand. It was just a feeling that said “do it.” Bes sped the car a bit, making sure no pedestrians were in sight and that once the nut was crushed, Bes could resume normal driving easily and without any issues. Everything was under control until Bes noticed something moving in the tree from where the nut had fallen.

What was that moving thing?!?!

Bes was less than 5 seconds away from the nut when another object came down from the tree onto the car, and then jumped on the road, running towards the nut. It was a squirrel. “0_0” was the exact expression on Bes’s face, with Bes’s eyes squinting so hard as if wanting to avoid looking directly at the sun from a close distance. Let me repeat that. Bes’s face looked like:

0_0 with squinted eyes

The brakes got pushed as hard as they could. It was machine crying out loud to stop from angering a squirrel, which would otherwise be crushed to death. The machine knew it could simply run over the small creature and get away with it, but no, something inside the car felt fear. There was some doubt about the whole scene, and the car tried its best to simply stop and not touch the squirrel. The squirrel stood there, not moving an inch. It noticed a car that was trying to hold onto the brakes like crazy, while stopping from some 65 miles per hour speeds. Bes swirled the car a bit to the right, hoping to miss the squirrel while the car was still trying to stop because of the stupendous speed Bes had accelerated to not a few moments ago.

Smoke filled up the scenery in the rear mirror as the tires cried for mercy. The brakes told the tires to keep crying and keep trying, as hopefully the 2+ ton car could hopefully stop before reaching the probably less than a pound squirrel. It did not work. Bes kept looking at the squirrel when the squirrel disappeared under the car, with the car still trying to stop.

The car did not stop!

Bes went over the squirrel, and after passing the scene of the chaos, Bes started glancing in the rear mirror, while the car came to an almost complete stop. Bes could not see clearly in the back because of the smoke. Bes let go of the brake, which made a very weird squealing sound at that very moment and gave a sudden jerk to the car. Bes was surprised. Had the brakes died? Had the tires burst? Finally, in the side mirror, when the dust settled a bit, Bes saw the the new nut owner still standing in the same spot, looking at the 2 ton monster that had just missed because Bes had swirled the car a bit to the right. The squirrel moved a bit towards the side, and then looked at Bes again, as if to say to Bes “Come back here and fight you sissy!” Bes knew better, and kept on driving towards home.

The car brakes sounded and felt weird on the way. Bes parked near the house and started driving around and reversing once in a while, in order to check the brakes. The brakes kept rubbing against something and shaking the car from time to time. That was bad. A nearby mechanic was open, so Bes drove there very slowly, making sure no other nutty squirrels got threatened by nutty Bes along the way. The mechanic was going to close within 20 minutes, so an appointment was scheduled for Bes for the following day at 9 in the morning. The last time I checked, Bes was hoping the repairs do not cost too much. Otherwise, it would be hard to ask a brave squirrel to pay up half of the money for the unexpected adventure that both the squirrel and Bes had gone through over a small nut.

The squirrel is out there….

Bes decided to write about the interesting incident with the nut and the nutty squirrel instead of the nice topic that was brewing in Bes’s head earlier. That other nice topic shall be posted tomorrow. I am sure the squirrel is also telling other squirrels in Berkeley about Bes driving off and not wanting to fight a squirrel which was willing to give its life over a nut. Bes just hopes the squirrel does not know where Bes lives. Bes also hopes that the squirrel does not know about this post.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

I think this is one of the hardest memes ever. I also think this is one of the best memes ever. A point about a goal in life? A point about several goals in life? That is so hard! I think life itself is here so we can find out what our goals are. Along the way, we can figure out a few things we would love to have to see in our lifetime. There are a few such things for me. I just focused on one point and decided to write about it below, because if I start wondering which goal or point in life to write about, I might spend a long time thinking and not actually writing. I would like to list a goal in my life here:

Find out whether goals involving only myself are more important than goals involving others

This is one of the most interesting questions in my life. Do I focus on myself, or do I focus on others? Is a secluded life better for me than a life spent among others? Can I live a life where I keep my entire personal life private from others, yet at the same time I blend with others to be part of other people’s lives in order to live life together? If you know me in person, you probably know the answer to those questions. I ask myself everyday whether or not focusing on myself can be good and better than simply helping others all the time.

Some people help others to feel better. Some people help others to find out more about themselves. Among the many other reasons, I think I help others for two main reasons because of my experiences in life:

1. Bes cannot imagine helpless people in misery or pain, both mental and physical, conscious or unconscious, direct or indirect
2. To figure out more about Bes each and every moment of life.

Thank you again Carolyn!

Thank you again Carolyn for tagging me with yet another amazing meme. As usual, I would like to tag anyone who would like to be tagged. Please write a post or comment below, or comment on Carolyn’s original post letting others know your goals, or one of your goals, in life. If you write a post, please be sure to give credit to Carolyn for this. I will link to you directly in this post through an update; you do not need to link back to this post.

Thank you for reading.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

Car rental company gave away my reserved and paid for rental car because of my flight being late

Then the rental car I was expecting from Advantage Rent A Car in Los Angeles because of my travel reservations through Expedia was not available anymore because of my flight being late. Then the car rental company charged me almost 4 times the amount to get me a brand new PT Cruiser, 2007 edition, which was the only thing they had left. Then the rental company gave me wrong directions to downtown Los Angeles, which were supposed to be shortcuts but resulted in me wasting an hour trying to find my way in a place I had moved away from less than 3 months ago.

People told me after I flew down around 500 miles that they needed more papers

Then the business people I had to go visit told me that they needed some more documents that they had forgotten to ask me before. Then the university appointment I had got canceled because of me being late. I was told to come later at night. Then when I got there, I was told that the professors in question had already left for the day, even though they told me earlier in the day that they wanted to see me. I also canceled 2 other appointments because of me being late due to the rental car.

Hotel reservation and computer at hotel both messed up

The hotel reservation got changed because Advantage Rent A Car notified Expedia that I had came to a new agreement with them for the rental car, resulting in the hotel reservation getting canceled for unknown reasons. Expedia support told me that I needed to book again and apologized. After getting the hotel room, the computer at the hotel that I had reserved for going online had a broken space bar, something that I have experienced in the past. Thus, every space you see in this post required me to push the central space bar connector built into the keyboard very hard, resulting in a lot of time spent going through the entire post to make sure I have the necessary spaces and that I do not have any extra spaces.

I met good friends at night

Later in the night, I met a few friends I had not met for a long time, and even though our meeting was very short, it was good.

Should I look for something to blame, or should I be happy because of what happened later in the night?

Here is the golden question: Who should be blamed for these series of blamable events? Here is the priceless question: should anyone or anything be blamed at all? This is a normal day in Southern California, but it seems like a waste of energy compared to what can be accomplished with better planning:

List of blamable events

• If only I had waken up a few minutes earlier.
• If only I had printed important things the prior night.
• If only the plane had left on time.
• If only the rental car was ready for me the minute I landed.
• If only the rental car company would not argue with someone who just posted about the dangers of telling someone they are wrong.
• If only the rental car company would give correct directions.
• If only I would not ask for directions.
• If only I had been told that more papers were needed for a business meeting.
• If only the university could reschedule me for another appointment soon.
• If only the professors would stay after their late night class instead of telling me to come while they leave early to head for the bars.
• If only appointments could be rescheduled when you call people in advance, instead of being told “Sorry, I can only cancel appointments at this time but you have to call between 8 am and noon to make new appointments.“
• If only Expedia would not cancel entire itineraries simply because some part of a trip changed due to the mentality of a car rental company.
• If only the space bar on this computer did not warrant more attention than the rest of the keyboard.

So tell me, my online friend: would you look at this day as a way to see who to blame based on “If only“, or would you look at this day as a day you met good friends?

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

Why the thought of retirement is scary for me

The second thought that comes to my mind regarding this is the possibility of us dying anytime, which makes me wonder how for me retirement is so unattractive because of this second thought being so true. The concept of retirement is taken by many people today to mean that we have to waste and sacrifice everything today in order to be happy financially in the last few years of our lives.

On looking at life as a long-term retirement opportunity

I tell myself the following when I think of the concept of retirement in life: be happy today while helping others, and keep aiming for bigger opportunities daily, and at the same time look forward to a future where happily working towards more opportunities will not be a hassle or waste of time. If I can have a happy and financially stable life today, I will not have to look desperately towards the future for those two things while wasting all the opportunities that can bring forth happiness and other things today.

On looking at blog as a short-term retirement opportunity

I tell myself the following when I think of blogging only for money: be happy blogging today and keep aiming on learning and sharing with others what is learned from life and blogs in order to help others, and at the same time look forward to a future where happily helping others through writing and learning from such experiences will not be felt as a hassle or waste of time. If money comes along writing what I feel people should know instead of writing things I do not believe in so that hordes of people can click on ads, great.

What do you think about retiring and looking forward to an end?

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

I got on the BART and went to San Francisco to do different things. I paid for different things with my card. At one store I decided to pay with cash. I reached in my pocket and found nothing. I was surprised until I realized I had given the haircutter a $37 tip for a $15 haircut, paying a total of $52. Since it was my mistake and she had innocently enjoyed from it, I decided to let her enjoy the money.

I viewed this loss of money as an investment

It is sometimes all right to ask for some money back if you accidentally overtip someone. In this situation, since several hours had passed already and because of the fact that I would be going to the same place in the future, going back and claiming the money which now belonged to her would have actually upset her. I was the one who had made a mistake. I will tell her next time about it while making sure she does not feel uncomfortable about the situation. I can then look at it as an investment, making a new friend along the way and increasing my list of connections. In Orange County, even the smallest gestures and actions helped me in different ways in the long run. I hope I can share those stories with you one day. I hope I can make such investments result in skyrocketed returns like never before in this new place.

Being nice to people and not taking the joy away from them, when you can afford it even a bit, does wonders in the long run. I would want the same joy to come to me, so I would love to give such joy to others when I can, or at least not take it away from them if I had the power to. Invest in good people by giving them happiness and by not taking away their happiness, and you will get the same returns in larger proportions and different forms.

What would you do in a similar situation? As for me, I do have to be careful the next time I decide to tip someone. Also, I think having shorter hair after having long unmanageable hair for a while seems like a fresh change that goes along with the recent move.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

I will be traveling on Thanksgiving to San Francisco to undergo a kind of an operation to see if this writer has any chance of making it past the next year or so. A quarter of a century has passed and along the way, I’ve encountered some interesting things in life. If it wasn’t for the computer crash, I would have had a book out by this coming January. I guess we’ll have to wait and see if I ever start writing it again.

To put it in simple words, this year has been a gathering storm for me. A lot has been experienced, and a lot has been known. I’ve also seen the true faces of many things, and I’ve also seen the limits that bound things in their place. I’ve also realized that feelings and friendships can hurt more than medical conditions. It’s all good.

It’s been almost 25 years since I’ve been breathing. It’s been 5 years since I started this site. It’s about 5 years since I wasted my time, health, energy and myself offering help in the darkness. It’s been almost a year since my condition was diagnosed, and it’s been every week or so this year that I’ve run into amazing situations that are worthy of a satirical movie.

Take care all, and thanks for reading.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

Some other interesting things have happened too. One of my poems was selected to be featured in a local newspaper/magazine of sorts in a small city. I was invited to write the lyrics to a love song that would be played at a United Nations festival nearby. We’ll see how that goes. I’m actually getting to know the doctors and nurses working during night shifts at the hospital, as I’ve been there 4 times this week already. Some of my recent pictures also got the attention of fellow photographers and others online. Following are some of the pictures that are being chosen by others to be featured here and there in different online groups and “picture of the day” pools:

Click on any picture to view a bigger version, or see them all in my Flickr gallery

I had some of the most delicious home food this week. American, Italian, Japanese and Korean! Holy wow. These people know how to cook, and they know how to cook well. They cooked so nicely for me that I’m not sure how I can ever repay them back. These delicious meals actually made me want to be a good cook and a good chef, the same way the movie “Eat Drink Man Woman” made me more interested in food.

That’s basically a good summary of what I can remember about this week at the moment. Anything else should come as a separate post soon. Besides the whole drama of being stabbed and my health, there isn’t much that I haven’t already explained a bit or not explained enough that I won’t explain in the near future in separate posts. I doubt I will go into great details about the nature of my health condition or any details, though I will post something soon about the stabbing.

To the people who have stopped commenting on this site simply because I don’t comment on their site anymore: I have an idea. I will comment on your site when I have time to visit your site and when I feel my comment can contribute at least a good happy tone to your posts. In turn, you do not need to comment on my site. I will post comments on your site without expecting anything in return, so it’s ok. I don’t want to feel pressured to post comments simply to get comments, so I wouldn’t want the same thing to be done to you, specially by me. From now on, since so many old timers have stopped commenting on this site because I don’t comment on theirs, you do not need to comment on my site if you don’t feel like it. That’s fine. I can’t comment everyday because of my health and a few other things. I’ll still comment since my rule of commenting is plain and simple. I’ll comment simply to respond to a post, not to throw a hook to get comment from you in return.

Till next time, take care. I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend, and I hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend. I’m looking forward to the rain. Thank you for reading this.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

These groups are based on a viral spam/hoax premise, similar to emails that claim you’ll earn cash, or help a cancer patient, if you forward those emails to all your friends.

The groups of this type on Facebook are doing the same exact thing. No one is asking why the fate of ones’ education rests on a group having many members, or how one would get money to plan a trip to Darfur simply by having thousands of members on Facebook, even when no member on facebook earns money because of this. Nothing about the promise can be verified either, thus rendering it almost impossible to find out if the group owner actually fulfils her/his promise or not.

The only thing that can be verified is that the group admins got what they wanted; a frenzy where people believe that something will actually happen simply because it’s facebook, and simply because someone with a real name and a picture on facebook promises to do something. While some group admins do intend to follow up on their promise, majority of the groups claim things that are either not important enough to be verified, or are too complex to be observed. From going to Darfur to buying a car for a homeless person to donating to a cancer patient to going back to school, there is a group out there that will cater to your needs. If you can’t find a group that promises to adopt penguins and unicorns if a million members join that group, let me know. I might start such a group.

This is a small new turn for spreading unverifiable viral information and promises. Nowadays, we don’t click the forward button that much in our email; we click the “Join” button on Facebook and MySpace.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

Another type of people act suicidal online, talking about depressing stuff with strangers while not actually having any intention of committing suicide. Some people think that if they talk about life and miseries in their posts, they’ll gain sympathy and a few more online comments. It’s an unconscious desire to be important and gain some attention, attention that cannot be had otherwise in their real life. These people have no intention of committing suicide or being actually depressed in real life, and they themselves make life hard for themselves. Yet, they keep talking about how much they need help, or how life is unfair, without actually describing why life is unfair. When someone actually reaches out for them and sincerely tries to help, they turn around and say that they need something more. They cannot handle any help, because they are not looking for any help in reality. They love living in their dreams of being lazy and inconsiderate and depend on the sympathy factor to get attention, as that’s what they’re aiming for: attention through sympathy, and not any kind of advice, guidance, sincere emotional support or even real help. Why do they do that? Because they know they have not achieved, and probably will not achieve, anything in life because they do not try hard for anything in life. They keep aiming for sympathy, and that’s what they’ll get in the end: they’ll become failures and people will then be sympathetic toward such losers.

Both of these types of people make it harder for people with real life situation to express themselves clearly or to do anything regarding helping others, as the usual channels of communication are clogged with the fake cries of the above two types of children who have everything handed over to them for free by their parents, yet they try to cry all the time as to how life is unfair for them, and they also try to compete in terms of sympathy with people who literally have nothing in life, and with people who want no sympathy from anyone for the darkness that defines them. What these two types of people don’t realize is, because of the fact that the internet is a very new phenomenon in history, something very important: if they keep acting like crying losers in real life who don’t do anything, going online and acting the same won’t make them heros simply because they’re protected by the monitor screen.

They’ll simply be forgotten, blocked and deleted from now on unless they change their ways and acknowledge the situation.

« Show less..

Continue reading… »

Yet, every task for the day was accomplished on time, except the task of doing certain things on time. Is it possible to achieve everything in a day without worrying about time, all the time? I wonder.

Here’s a picture taken of an electronics store near Fisherman’s Wharf, San Francisco, right next to The Cannery. There were a few stores with similar displays catering to the things they sold.

« Show less..